I have shamelessly stolen Will Hay’s “Windbag the sailor” as the persona for my blog.
I have a soft spot for Will Hay’s 1930s films, in all of which he plays that staple of British comedy – the bumbling, innocent, aspirational and slightly leery working class bloke who always sees himself one step further up the social ladder than he can reach and makes a bit of a twit of himself as a result. With a regular supporting cast these films were examples of a tried and tested formula, familiar to anyone who has seen an Arthur Askey film for example, or come across Galton and Simpson’s somewhat later Hancock or Harold Steptoe.
In this 1937 outing Will plays “Captain” Ben Cutlet, a one time canal boat skipper, down on his luck and working in his sister’s pub, spending the evenings mooching for drinks while regaling the regulars with inconsistent and incredulous salty tales of piracy and passage, tempest and treasure. The regular entourage are on hand; Moore Marriott as the toothless, squeaky voiced Harbottle serving behind the bar and Graham Moffat as the cheeky young pot-bellied pot-washer, Albert.
While most locals greet these nebulous nautical yarns with a polite tolerance and utter disbelief, gullible heiress Olivia Potter-Porter is captivated by Captain Ben’s tales, and when a skipper is urgently needed for her Green Star Line’s Rob Roy, she has little hesitation in suggesting him for the position. Her oily business partner, Yates, is unconvinced but has a change of heart when he sees Captain Ben’s floundering performance at a local Sea Scouts meeting. He hatches a plan with the first mate to collect on the insurance; Captain Ben will take the clapped out Rob Roy on her next, and most definitely last voyage.
And so, unable to refuse without an unacceptable loss of face, and in spite of several failed attempts to weasel out of it, Captain Ben ends up skippering the Rob Roy, with Albert and Harbottle as unexpected stowaways, on a short passage from the south of England to Norway.
Nine weeks into the voyage he starts to get suspicious.
Isn’t Norway closer than this?
And why is it getting warmer rather than colder?
It’s mutiny time. Captain Ben and Harbottle are tied to a mast while the crew prepare to scupper the boat and man the lifeboats. But things don’t go quite to plan. Albert wants to be a mutineer too and in the high spirits of the moment the crew accept him as one of their own. With the help of McPhail the engineer, diffident to the mutiny but unwilling to sacrifice Captain Ben’s life, the threesome escape on a life-raft where, without supplies, the camaraderie evaporates as quickly as their meagre drinking water.
Joy at fortuitously finding land soon turns sour when they find themselves in the hands of a cannibal tribe; but a combination of quick thinking and the incongruous Pacific Ocean reception of Radio Luxembourg on an old wireless set soon wins over the locals. Captain Ben enjoys the comfortable life of a chief, while Harbottle and Albert enjoy the grass-skirted native girls.
More good luck comes when the mutinous crew wash up on the island followed by the drifting Rob Roy. Captain Ben, Harbottle and Albert are able to make their escape with the mutineers locked up in the hold.
Lost on the ocean, the sight of fireworks sparks a debate over whether the clueless mariners are off the Crystal Palace or Blackpool when, in another bit of fortuitous good luck, the Rob Roy bumps, quite literally, into a stranded millionaire’s yacht, deftly shifting it off a sandbank. Awarding seamanship worthy of Nelson, the grateful yachtsman lends Captain Ben some competent crew and they soon return to a heroes welcome in England and a traditional happy ending, with the oily Yates and his mutineers prison bound. A happy ending marred only by Captain Ben’s ego getting the better of him at the last minute; insisting on taking the wheel when returning to port and demolishing the town pier as a result.
Windbag the Sailor is a gentle and charming classic of British comedy cinema, well worth a look as an introduction to both the genre and the works of the always agreeable Will Hay.
